Useful help

Are you helping just for the sake?

Or

Are you genuinely lending a hand? If yes,

Are you ensuring whether the help is in a usable form and not a show off type?

Are you ensuring whether the help offered by you was useful to the recipients?

Otherwise why do we need need to help them, just to make them obliged?

Can’t do anything if the help is just a show off type. But there are cases when we oversee it. Even if we didn’t have any secret agenda behind the helping hands, we miss to shape it in a better form. Or rather we don’t ensure the quality of the help given. If we could think or imagine ourselves to be in that recipients’ position, the help will definitely be a useful one.

About

The author is a Quality Assurance professional by experience. Part Quantitative data analyst, part consultant for quality and information security practices, part software tester, she is a writer by passion and blogs at http://wordsandnotion.com and http://qualitynotion.com/.

One thought on “Useful help

  1. Author
  2. Shalini Sharrma

    August 16, 2016 at 11:12am

    Seriously, few people help just for the sake of helping and then expect same from the person, they helped until they realize that ‘tit for tat’ is so true a law. Good post !

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    • Author

      Akhila

      August 16, 2016 at 11:14am

      thanks Shalini..there are people who just try to place themselves in that ‘good men’ list…and rarely they are bothered about their genuineness.

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        • Author

          Akhila

          August 16, 2016 at 11:50am

          and shal.. you see, there is a another version to this.. i.e. didnt have any intend of doing it just for the sake.. but we did it, being in our comfort zone or didnt bother to ensure the value add offered..we did it for them, but didnt understand the poor quality offered..

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    • Varsh

      August 16, 2016 at 12:58pm

      Genuine help can be a matter of perception. What I feel as useful might not be the same for someone else or even the recipient. That doesn’t make me selfish or bad.
      What I feel is that the feeling behind the help, if honest, must be appreciated.

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      • Author

        Akhila

        August 16, 2016 at 5:05pm

        you see.. the word perception is already blocked in this world.. 😉
        and now reading your comment.. “feeling” behind the genuine help must be appreciated as I added in the picture…and at the same time, why do I need to share an information to someone without any clarity/readability, even for myself..? That’s my point..help should not be just for the sake and moreover it needs to have that value addition. otherwise, i may be satisfied personally at the very first moment of offering help, but wont meet the intended purpose.

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      • Shalini Sharrma

        August 17, 2016 at 9:48am

        I agree.. still if that help is like this as in the pic above, i mean it’s okay then not to even help honestly .

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  3. theonlysup

    August 16, 2016 at 11:21am

    true. rather than focusing on what’s convenient and easy for you, focus on what’s the value added to the service you provide to the user , be it a product, a service , or a help like you said to the other person.

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    • Author

      Akhila

      August 16, 2016 at 11:38am

      thanks Sup..you are absolutely right.. be it a product, a service or a help, we need to be aware of the value addition..if no value addition, why do we need to help someone, just for the sake..

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  4. Jackie Jain

    August 16, 2016 at 11:41am

    Yes, very true. Some people help others to show off or just to justify their relation. They do not do it for a useful cause. If everyone helps others when needed without any other hidden motive, how great our world would have been.

    Have a beautiful day, Akhila. 🙂

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    • Author

      Akhila

      August 16, 2016 at 11:43am

      thanks jackie.may be then the world would have been calm and peaceful.. similar days through out..wont it be boring..?oh , yes.. that’s why god injected selfishness to this beautiful world..

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      • Jackie Jain

        August 16, 2016 at 11:48am

        Yes. May be. Everyone will be a helpful person in a helping world. So for a change, who knows we are all under a test of who stays the same helpful person even in a selfish world. 😉

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        • Author

          Akhila

          August 16, 2016 at 11:56am

          yeah..who knows we are the pieces in a simulated game..

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  5. Nisthur Anadi

    August 16, 2016 at 11:52am

    Is it not serving the world in competenc we have is enough help ?

    Are not we help the self by helping others to gain a credit and pamper our ego ?

    If we feel

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    • Author

      Akhila

      August 16, 2016 at 5:08pm

      helping the self is of course a good thought.. yes, we need to satisfy our ego also..and it should not be hurting some one else

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  6. preeti

    August 16, 2016 at 12:31pm

    Great article akhila.we always want something in exchange if we do something for others.,I think this attitude is not good.it our behavior to help someone without explanation we just have to do service

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    • Author

      Akhila

      August 16, 2016 at 2:45pm

      True it is preeti..but a rare quality nowadays…and my point is digging the quality of help…never do it just for a sake

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  7. pins & ashes

    August 16, 2016 at 12:59pm

    I think it become “help” — helping and returning help when one thinks of it as “help” in the first place. Why think that way, think of it as passing information, or co-living (if there is a word like that) if somebody asks me for something, and I have the information or the means, well I pass it on (or let’s pass it on) and forget about it… when it becomes obligatory, then it no longer become help. it become a power relation.

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    • pins & ashes

      August 16, 2016 at 1:16pm

      I agree to whatever you say, some/most people have ulterior motives. We need to think of the recipient’s position as well, true very. Haven’t you met anybody who helps and forgets, like a stranger on the road, at least .. I think helping another is a human instinct, let’s keep it that way (borrowing somebody’s fav line :D)

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      • vicky

        August 16, 2016 at 5:22pm

        ash I guess Akhila is talking about those who pretend to help, especially the religious ones. they think their prayers help.. when the truth is it doesn’t but still those people believe it does, makes them feel good about themselves. On the other hand when the person who prays needs help he doesn’t accept the prayers wants something more than just prayers expects help like real help .

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        • pins & ashes

          August 16, 2016 at 6:45pm

          Ah! That way eh.. Mm so these so callwd religious retreats especially has something about it. People who go to their for a miracle are asked to pray for somebody else so that, that social act of theirs praying for somebody else will get them some benefit for their cause! It is funny .. But ya, lot of people pretend to help, and mostly don’t help at all, it is all hollow words ..

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          • pins & ashes

            August 16, 2016 at 6:54pm

            But I still feel the word help is the biggest disadvantage! It has got this temporary and I-will-be-with-you-only -when-I’m-free ring to it. So term “useful help” to me sounds an oxymoron, therefore.

          • vicky

            August 16, 2016 at 7:39pm

            so let’s do it .. you pray that I should get expensive cars and I will pray for you for the same let’s wait for a miracle

          • pins & ashes

            August 16, 2016 at 7:40pm

            Haha… I don’t want cars.. I want a that ride to all places on earth so you pray that..

          • pins & ashes

            August 16, 2016 at 7:43pm

            OK autocorrect be nice now. Vicks U know the vehicle I’m talking about don’t you.. Autocorrect will make it that again .. Replace the second t of that with an R..

          • vicky

            August 16, 2016 at 8:35pm

            thar ride ? you mean a camel ?

    • Author

      Akhila

      August 16, 2016 at 5:12pm

      hmm.. ash.. it is okay to pass on the information we have..and why not passing it in a better form..just think about sending something through whatsapp..why cant you take a better image and share it instead of a poor quality one..? that’s all.. as simple as it is..
      and definitely, as you said, we may not be thinking much on our actions especially when it is a sort of the reflex action ..and then let it pass on..

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    • pins & ashes

      August 16, 2016 at 1:17pm

      she blocked you! haw! Varsh let’s do a dharna.. we want justice 😀 😛 😛

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    • Author

      Akhila

      August 16, 2016 at 5:16pm

      i just had a cup of tea.. did that comment come in front of my tea cup..then…;)

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    • Author

      Akhila

      August 16, 2016 at 2:39pm

      Thanks a lot. Really appreciates your comment

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  8. myheartbeats4ublog

    August 16, 2016 at 2:19pm

    hahaha.. is everything conditional/ with some ulterior motive! selflessness, unconditional – are these meaningless terms?? Anyway, interesting post..

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    • Author
      • Author

        Akhila

        August 17, 2016 at 9:41am

        i believe in those selflessness, unconditional thing etc etc..it still exists in this world…and at the same time we have to accept the other side of the story also..

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        • pins & ashes

          August 17, 2016 at 10:20am

          oh there will be always other sides.. but I’d like to think of people as good.. let’s put it that way

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          • Author

            Akhila

            August 17, 2016 at 10:22am

            hmm.. why should we stress ourselves,na ..?

          • pins & ashes

            August 17, 2016 at 10:43am

            exactly, why should we.. ! stop thinking only! just be and do matter solved.

          • Author

            Akhila

            August 17, 2016 at 10:46am

            and you know, when we happen to understand someone playing that drama, we ourselves get enlightened..Enlightened on the way we need to be… a better way that we didn’t think/know before..

  9. shilpamohan5

    August 16, 2016 at 5:06pm

    True…sahacharyangal manasilakki avanam oro sahayavum cheyyendath..allenkil ath negative ayi theernnennum varam 😉

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    • Author

      Akhila

      August 16, 2016 at 5:14pm

      true shilpa..sometimes it turns out to be even negative..

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        • Author

          Akhila

          August 16, 2016 at 5:16pm

          think better if it is normal action.. but for reflex action, we cant do anything.. let it come as it is..

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  10. Author

    Akhila

    August 16, 2016 at 5:19pm

    thanks shonessa..glad with your words.. we are facing similar instances every day.. situations only differ.and such little incidents are actually the best teachers..

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  11. Author
  12. Author

    Akhila

    August 16, 2016 at 5:41pm

    Definitely help is not any conditional stuffs..it happens as it is..Again, it need not be a reflex action always to be least bothered on the value addition…

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  13. chembaneer

    August 17, 2016 at 2:58am

    ”സഹായിക്കാൻ മനസ്സുള്ളവർ ചുരുക്കം….
    ചിലർ മനസ്സുണ്ടെങ്കിലും നേരമില്ലാത്തവർ
    അതിനിടയിൽ ഉദ്ദേശശുദ്ധിയെ ചോദ്യം
    ചെയ്തിട്ടെന്തുകാര്യം….”

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  14. Author
  15. Author

    Akhila

    August 17, 2016 at 9:48am

    questions are not to judge someone else.. just a way of introspecting oneself..just to make ourselves better and not to evaluate someone else. take it in that way..

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  16. Author

    Akhila

    August 17, 2016 at 10:15am

    ash…. there are people who create such dramas of help even if we didn’t demand.. I donno how it’s advantageous for them..
    and now just do a self analysis…if we fall into that category.. that’s all..

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  17. vicky

    August 17, 2016 at 10:26am

    baby elephant on a camel . let me know when you do that so I can click a pic and become world famous

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    • pins & ashes

      August 17, 2016 at 10:27am

      I thought you, akhila and I were doing that trip together.. 😀 😛

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  18. parijat shukla

    August 17, 2016 at 7:35pm

    Yes many times people help with a view to get it back with interest and even this is not done wholeheartedly.

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    • Author

      Akhila

      August 17, 2016 at 8:55pm

      True..and we need to be aware on this when the ball is in our court

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