രാധയ്ക്കറിയാം ..

By | August 21, 2016

ഒരാള്‍ക്ക് രണ്ടുപേരെ പ്രേമിക്കാന്‍ കഴിയുമോ, ആത്മാര്‍ഥമായി തന്നെ? പക്ഷെ ആത്മാര്‍ഥതയെ എങ്ങനെ നിര്‍വചിക്കും? ആ നിര്‍വചനം അടിസ്ഥാനമാക്കിയായിരിക്കും എന്‍റെ ചോദ്യത്തിന്‍റെ ഉത്തരം. രണ്ടുപേരെ പ്രേമിക്കാന്‍ കഴിയുന്നെങ്കില്‍ അതില്‍ ആത്മാര്‍ഥത ഉണ്ടാവില്ലെന്നാണു എനിക്ക് തോന്നുന്നത്. എന്നാലും ആത്മാര്‍ഥതയുടെ അര്‍ഥം ഒന്നു മാറ്റിപ്പിടിച്ചാല്‍ അങ്ങിനെ കഴിയില്ലേ? അവിടെ സത്യത്തില്‍ ചതിയോ വഞ്ചനയോ ഇല്ലല്ലോ, ഉള്ളതു സ്നേഹം മാത്രം അല്ലേ, എന്നും ചിന്തിക്കാമല്ലോ?

പിന്നെയുള്ളത് നമ്മുടെ സമൂഹത്തിന്‍റെ വീക്ഷണമാണ്. ഒരേ സമയം രണ്ടുപേരെ പ്രേമിച്ചു നടന്നാല്‍ സമൂഹം പറയും അതു ‘ചതി’ ആണെന്ന്. ഒരാളെ ഒഴിവാക്കിയ ശേഷം (ഒഴിവായ ശേഷവും ആവാം) മറ്റൊരാളെ സ്നേഹിച്ചാല്‍ അതു കുഴപ്പമില്ല. അതാണു നമ്മുടെ സമൂഹത്തിന്‍റെ വിലയിരുത്തല്‍. രണ്ടാമത്തെ സാഹചര്യത്തില്‍ ഒരാള്‍ വഞ്ചിക്കുന്നത് അയാളുടെ മനസ്സിനെത്തന്നെ അല്ലേ. ഒരു കാലത്തു ആത്മാര്‍ഥമായി സ്നേഹിച്ച വ്യക്തിയെ മനസ്സീന്നു ഇറക്കിവിട്ടിട്ട് എങ്ങനെ അവിടെ മറ്റൊരാളെ പ്രതിഷ്ഠിക്കാന്‍ കഴിയും? ഒരിക്കലും ഒരാള്‍ക്കും അതിനു പൂര്‍ണ്ണമായും കഴിയില്ല,സ്വയം അങ്ങിനെ വിശ്വസിപ്പിക്കാനല്ലാതെ.

സ്നേഹം സത്യമാണ്. അതു തെളിയിക്കപ്പെടുന്നത് കാലത്തിന്‍റെ മുമ്പിലാണ്. അതൊരിക്കലും ക്ഷണികമായ ഭ്രമത്തില്‍ നിന്നുള്ളതല്ല. ശാശ്വതമാണ്. അതുകൊണ്ട് തന്നെ ഒരു മനസ്സിനു മറ്റൊരു മനസ്സിനെ മാത്രമേ സ്നേഹിക്കാന്‍ കഴിയൂ, മറ്റ്‌ “ഒരേയൊരു മനസ്സിനെ” മാത്രമേ സ്നേഹിക്കാന്‍ കഴിയൂ.

0 thoughts on “രാധയ്ക്കറിയാം ..

  1. wordsandnotion Post author

    Degree of love..? Is there something like that..?

    Reply
  2. Sree

    LOve cant be defined..In this world..its not genuine..
    love is selfish.

    Reply
    1. wordsandnotion Post author

      Thanks a lot for visiting and commenting.
      But I don’t agree with you fully.. true love won’t be driven by selfishness.

      Reply
  3. Aneesh Sreekumar

    One can love TWO people at the same time? Yes ! Married guys love their mom and wife at the same time. Children loving mom and dad at the same time. In the former men struggle to find the right balance and hence many discords. But latter has more harmony which may later deteriorate! And time heals wounds inflicted by love. Another person will conquer your heart. Eventhough the wounds have healed the scars left behind will force us to remember the past! Great post this!
    Looking forward to reading such wonderful posts in Malayalam more often!

    Reply
    1. Akhila Post author

      Thank you Aneesh.. Your comments are really a booster..You are absolutely correct, the scars left behind will force us to remember the past. That’s why I ask how can one love ( not a children-parent’s love or a son-wife/mother love etc.etc .) two people at the same time..? Will it be sincere?
      Heard that Radha is a virtual character…But I adore her a lot, dream her a lot, believe in her true love.

      Reply
      1. Aneesh Sreekumar

        Yes it can be sincere! It again hinges upon perspectives and meanings! I may love two girls sincerely from my own perspective, but the society may give another meaning called TWO TIMING! But there are examples of two persons being loved at the same time! Bajirao Mastani could be an example! I still think it is hard to love two with same sincerity! I would think that I am cheating on the other one!
        When society was still evolving, the most primitive societies had no restrictions for women as well as men for loving, having sex, or marrying a different person! Because promiscuity was the norm! There were no notions of SINCERITY! There was love and lust and freedom! Gradually as the soceites started getting more organised! There was surplus production, evolution of exchange relations, growth of market. This lead to the creation of wealth! Wealth was concentrated in the hands of few! The concern of the few, as they started amassing more wealth, became the overwhelming need for concentration of wealth in the same hands/or heirs even after the death of the present wealth holder! Thus, the freedom, love, lust, promiscuisity and marriage all these concepts went for a toss! Women couldnt be more free like before, she couldnt get into physical relationships with men and vice versa( of course secretly they could but what once was explicit became implicit). In place of promiscuisity, the institution of marriage was placed and the importance of maintaining the purity of marriage was emphasised… Thus the role of women changed forever… This lead to growth of patriarchy and surrender of women’s right to decision making, body and autonomy being transfered to man! The wedlock was legitimised more with the growing hold of religion and their beliefs. The orginal sin, manusmrithi, quran everything subordinated women to man. Family , marriage was emphasised with increasign stress on SINCERITY, FAITH, MUTUAL RESPECT, OFFSPRINGS, NO TO ADULTERY etc…..Thus the notion of sincerity still rules in all the societies and those who love two or more at the same time are branded as cheaters or INSINCERE! It has been ringed into our minds and even we will think twice before loving more than one person! These notions may change! For instance SEX as we know is changing! (I would not like to get explicit here!) as society progress forward!

        Radha ! Yes she is great! But how many radhas in real society will be held as pious? Not even a single one! Because, when women violate the streotypical image held by a patriarchal society, there will be backlash for the woman in question. But still MEERA managed to do it!!

        The conclusion is (as I think): You can only love one person sincerely! If that persons walks out of your life. its unfortunate. Time will heel the wounds but scar will stay.!! But if you love more than one at the same time SINCERELY, society will bring you back to its notions of SINCERITY! SheHe may still love many but it will be suppressed… And over the course of herhis life they will change or evolve the notions about Sincere love..through fatherhood, motherhoood and the teen problems it brings along!!

        Reply
        1. Akhila Post author

          Aneesh .. it is wonderful reply. full of logic..you have shared a great perspective linking to the ancient world.
          we can never ignore the left scars of history. It will chase every here and there. Even though luckily I don’t have any scars left, I strongly believe in the sincere love. Mind may be adaptive, but never one can lie to his/her mind. So I believe one can’t love many sincerely. i really liked your comparison upon the ancient people. True that they never should have thought in that angle of sincerity and all. Will it be the same case with animals too..?

          Reply
          1. Aneesh Sreekumar

            Whatever I wrote as comment, its not mine! It was said by Fredereich Engles, Karl Marx’s companion! I am a sociology student. So I know theories describing how society’s evolve, grow and reach a saturation point! Fredereich Engles tried to trace the orgins of subordination of women. I added the notions of sincerity to it which evolve trhough culture. Karl Marx traces the evolution of society in europe similarly in four stages, Primitive communism, Slave Society, Feudalism, Capitalism and finally his eutopia Communism…. What I told is true and was the norm in Primitive Communism societies that is before property evolved and property was held in common! Its not speculations!
            But the problem is there are many such theories describing how societies evolved. But the crux is that as societise evolve from simple to complex the culture, norms, values, roles, myths, religion etc too evolve along… We shape societies and societies shape us! Space doesnt permit to go deeper but reading a basic sociology book would help!
            I too believe no one can love one person sincerely……
            And animals…….well they dont even have the sixth sense! Its we who think on behalf of them and write about them! So its out of the questioN!

            Again I didnt compare… It was done by Engles, Marx, Durkheim, Hobbes, Mill all the guys thought and wrote about it!! So….

          2. Aneesh Sreekumar

            Kaanan oru glamour illanjitta
            Pakshe Bhayangara buddhiyaa!!! Lol!

            Not a great student! Just a humble observer commenting to a good poet!

  4. thecucumbercity

    Even closed everything with mutual understanding, can’t even think about another one, then how can someone love two persons at a time. That’s not Sincere Love. Or perhaps I say it’s not ‘The Love without lust’. We wish only good things for the other one. So if we love two person at a time it does not mean that you are cheating, but you are hurting both of them. Somebody loves somebody sincerely never hurt that somebody. We designed/created to have one soulmate forever. I don’t know this is something I felt.

    Reply
  5. myheartbeats4ublog

    well expressed view. hmmmm, but debatable. also, why categorize love, as in parent-child, wife-husband etc?? is’nt pure love common in all relationships, I wonder….

    Reply
  6. Masoom Jethwa

    The language.
    മലയാളം വായിക്കാൻ ഗുണവും, എന്നാൽ മാത്രം Google പരിഭാഷ സഹായത്തോടെ. ഞാൻ ചില തെറ്റായ തോന്നലും പക്ഷം നമക്കേ

    Reply
  7. Pingback: Is it possible to love romantically more than one person at a time? | Words and Notion

    1. Akhila Post author

      do you mean you can be committed to two persons at a time, with a varying intensity..?

      Reply
          1. Akhila Post author

            hmm..even the thoughts are much beyond my brain to accept.

          2. Akhila Post author

            oh.. read my question once again…romantically only one love life for me..

  8. G.Radhakrishnan Poonthura

    താങ്കളുടെ പഴയൊരു വരി ഞാനിവിടെ കടം കൊള്ളുകയാണ് ” പ്രേമിക്കുന്നത്

    Reply
    1. G.Radhakrishnan Poonthura

      പ്രേമിക്കുന്നത് തലച്ചോറു കൊണ്ടാണോ? ഇല്ലങ്കിൽ ഉറപ്പായും “രാധയ്ക്കറിയാം”

      Reply
      1. Akhila Post author

        so happy that you captured the true essence of those posts… you are absolutely correct and the second post was a continuation of the first one….

        Reply
  9. ranjith17blog

    You can’t love two at a time sincerely as you told, but I believe you can love one sincerely and be in a great pain because of the other at the same time. Premam and Viraham can be felt because of the two people at the same period of time

    Reply
    1. Akhila Post author

      ithoru puthiya arivanallo, premam and viraham at the same time …may be words from an experienced heart..;)

      Reply
          1. ranjith17blog

            Athalado. He would have known Premam and viraham can be there at the same time. He had a lot of wives ryt.

          2. Akhila Post author

            angine….have you read randammoozham..in that book krishan is just a human..was feeling a new dimension for krishnan after reading that…

          3. ranjith17blog

            I too had but was more thinking about the difference between hidumbi and panchali….and whom to like more.

          4. Akhila Post author

            novels could make us to have different perspectives.. but who knows the underlying facts..

          5. Akhila Post author

            true…is there any books on him.. like randam moozham for bheeman

  10. Rekha @ Dew Drops

    I don’t think love I’d measurable or can be restricted by any means. Human heart and mind are not controlled by society. But yes, our actions on the outside are definitely controlled by what people will think. Have been reading a lot about love but none of it felt logically right. I guess it varies from person to person and situation to situation. Malayalam vaayikaam and parayaam, but writing is difficult for me. Glad to have dropped in. 🙂

    Reply
    1. Akhila Post author

      Really glad to know that you can read and speak malayalam..ya, as you said, there are many definitions for love…and then just pay attention to ones own heart . that’s all we can do

      Reply

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