People come and leave our life while some are glued to our hearts. It’s easy to be among strangers as there is no obligations, no demands, no expectations etc etc [Read about “The comfort while being with strangers“]. But when it’s about the glued ones, there is some sort of happiness and at the same time some sort of nervousness too.

What’s that nervousness with them..?

Is it the worries about sustaining the relationship? But does it really matter if they really understand you? Is there any extra effort required to sustain the relationship if there exists a healthy relationship?

No… so what’s that cause of uneasiness or nervousness..?

Is it fear of losing them..? Possible.. You don’t want to miss them as they have become a part of your life and it would be painful if lost them.. Oh.. So isn’t it a selfish thought?.. Like you don’t want to make yourself worried, so you want them to be with you.. hmm…

If you don’t think it to be selfishness, is there any other cause for that uneasiness?

Is it like you have to keep an image with them? ..Say like you are of the type “What others think?”

Okay, if still you think that none of the reasons matches that uneasiness, what else it could be..?

Is it like you love them, care them and trust them, but still feel lonely with them? Like they are not being there for you emotionally. You feel rejected while you were starving for their attention. You are supported neither in your highest good nor in your bad.

Is it like you are never on the same page? So while trying to be on the same page, folds and cuts appear in the page. Those marks remain forever while trying to make yourself fit in to that page, making you uncomfortable.

Is it due to the absence of comfort zone you have with them? You are not free enough to be frank in front of them or you think they don’t let you get inside their zone.

Or is it the sense of wanting to belong as posted here ? When the possessiveness comes in to picture one cannot live without expectations. You worry about the unattended emotions. You are bothered on the lack of acknowledgements.

If you could compromise all these for the sake of peace, well obviously it would be easy to maintain a relationship. But will it be an intimate one then?

So ultimately it makes one to ponder that

You need to work hard at a relationship. So there is no need of feeling down if people say ‘you are in a bad choice’ seeing you working hard.

Ultimately it’s your life and your choice. No one else is responsible for the same. Do whatever makes you happy and positive. And own whatever you do.

Thinking aloud why it should be treated as a big problem after all? Just ….

There is some comfort while being with strangers. Have you experienced that?

You don’t have to open your inner self in front of them. So no worries on your hidden thoughts being stolen.

There is no obligations, no love. Only thing you need to ensure is to keep a safe distance. 😉

Curtain rose. People appeared on stage. There were paints and powders on their faces. All were happily singing and dancing all around. Oh the show didn’t end there too; the masked people were trying to make others happy too. What a fantastic world, hmmm.

I too believed in their show offs until I found some more faces in the stage whose eyes reflecting something deep, some sort of distress. Nothing was spoken by them. But those eyes were trying to convey something on this drama. “What can be done when people try to please each other at the cost of a third person’s comfort?”

Even sometimes my devilish mind imagines all these ‘pleasing games’ to be some dramas or show offs by those people. Can they continue with these manipulations throughout their life just to please some other selflessly? And more over to that while making someone happy they hurt some other souls knowingly or unknowingly. These actors are never bothered on the souls who are hurt by the mutually pleasing games.

Making others happy is indeed a great thing. But it should neither be at the cost of one’s own total comfort nor a third person’s.

Stop expecting from others. Just live in your priorities while being comfortable in your own skin.

“When people are running, you should run in the middle”

It’s a proverb actually meaning ‘one must strive to assimilate to the norm’.

Maybe it’s another prejudice wall built in the minds of people asking to change yourself when everyone around you is changing. And people easily fall in to that just to avoid that “awkward” state of being odd.

But,

Why do you need to go with the normal flow? You are living in your priorities and comfort. Of course, sometimes your priorities may overrule your comfort. But as long as you are only setting up your priorities and defining your comfort, why should you run in the middle of the crowd and make yourself less creative?

Okay, if you still wish to run in the middle ( as you are afraid of oddness or uniqueness) while people around you are running, better not to let your feet run faster than your shoes and make yourself fall. 

 

Precept of a woman,

“Don’t enter into my comfort zone. Don’t try to intrude through my vulnerability. As I have learned to win over it already.  If you are still trying to enter into my comfort zone without my will, be ready to face the hardest hit in the world. Beware..”

The child was sleeping so peacefully with her hands resting on a pokemon teddy while her grandma had that holy book in her hand.

Can you see some irony there? Both are having their comfort objects in their hands.

Is God the teddy for grown-ups, a source of comfort or a security object?

Both are offering a kind of protective embrace, a reconstruction of faith.  For the kid it’s the teddy while it’s a version of God for adults, making them escape from some unknown fear.

Kids escape from the fear of darkness with a teddy. He assures himself “someone is there with me always”, like God for grown-ups.

Comfort is not my topmost priority. But priority and comfort make my way.

car

Give comfort to your co-traveller.

Don’t think too much. I meant the actual co- traveller in your car itself.

Imagine you got a lift from your friend’s cousin, and you are not familiar with him/her.

Then how uncomfortable will it be if that person is not at all talking to you during travel.

You might feel so restless to travel with such a person, and feel just like put in an undeserved place.

(And the same situation plays even while travelling with a familiar one too)

Now imagine yourself as that friend’s cousin and think how you will act with your co- traveller..