Neighbour : Hello, happy to have you here.
He : Thank you so much.
Neighbour : What are you doing here?
He : I am a home maker and my wife is working in a nearby firm.
Is there something weird on this conservation?
By default you are thinking about your mom or wife as the home maker.. Right..?
Why do you think it to be a woman? I know that majority of the answers which I received in response to my yesterday’s post had taken the default assumption. i.e. a home maker is a woman.
Again, it all depends on the culture in one’s country.
Women are not kitchen lovers (Exceptions could be there who are passionate on cooking). Who had put that crown of home making upon her head without her permission?
Is there any biological explanation of the same.. ?
I don’t think so.. Hence probably it might have rooted on the societal forces.
Yes, of course education and employment had influenced a lot in the ‘male-bread winner, female- home maker’ family model. And there are a lot many female employers, employees around us. And interestingly majority of them are carrying the same old crown of home making too.
Today’s women are deeply engaged in office work. And at home, they start their second shift with cooking, cleaning, laundry, mending, food shopping etc etc. On a normal day nearly half of them will take up house hold work while 20-25 % of men only will do the same as per labour statistics.
The fact which had attracted me based on yesterday’s response (please check the post Just a Question..) was that ‘many of you suggested to have a break from home making Or you want a break from both cases, an entire break’.
Of course home making is not an easy task. There are many aspects to be taken care in our day to day life at home. It requires constant attention and patience. And it is not a one day task. It is like a never ending vicious circle as Shalini commented. House wives plan for a day, plan for a week, plan for a month, at times they need to have plans for a year also for the effective execution of their household work. So there is no doubt why you preferred to have a break from home making while responded to my yesterday’s question.
I am quite sure that some of my male blogging friends might get irritated with this post. Please excuse me. And I wish if you could understand the true essence behind this post. I just want you to think atleast a moment about your working wife, about your working mom and then decide how you can be a helping hand for her. Just ask her honest opinion. Or do you want her to juggle between work and home always?
And I am quite sure that there are a good number of kind men too who are there to share the load with women. But their percentage is sadly on the lower side.
And interestingly majority of these working home makers will never raise a complaint on home making because they might have already taken it as a part of their daily routine along with office work.
Now you will be asking me, ‘If they don’t have any complaints, why I am bothered..?’..
Yes.. in fact while I started to write this post, I was very much concerned about the working home makers. I was taking effort to help them, to help them come out of the situation.
But now I can see, my state of mind is getting changed…
A dilemma is created..
So back to your question on whether I am bothered about those working home makers.
Now I feel my concern have transformed into a state of pride. Yes, I am really proud of them..
Now let me say to them “Your potential is used in the best way while you are managing both your home and office. Don’t care whether someone is looking at you, whether someone is appreciating your effort. It is you only, who can manage these stuffs in the best way. Let your counterpart realize their ineligibility. You are always busy which means that your mind is really smart. Do appreciate it by yourself, if there is no one else to appreciate you. Understand that a woman is strong enough to handle the daily life stuff in the best way. You are naturally gifted with a talent of multitasking as said by Suprith. Your capabilities are always fine-tuned to adjust with any situations.”
And finally it is all about performing the role well whether we are breaking away from the traditional role or not…
Happy is a state of mind and we create our own happiness with our own attitudes.
Or is it like you have to set boundaries on what is expected if your ultimate intention is to be happy?
( yeah… the question is still valid and needs further exploration)
Love , trust and respect – let the relationship be rooted on these three factors and it will make yourself to be a proud home maker/bread winner irrespective of your gender.