Negativity sells everywhere.
Do you know how cleverly the negativity creeps into your thoughts even while idealistic thoughts were ruling your brain? You won’t even realize that you are being negative and spreading such negative thoughts. At the epitome of emotions, the negative words out of your mouth have the potential to reach many ears and get sold everywhere.
People normally have a tendency to focus on the negative conclusion, a kind of exaggeration of negative extremities. In fact they wont be even knowing the full facts before judging or arriving at some conclusions, still goes with the negative percent. There maybe a 10% chance for your fear, still forgetting the 90% of wellbeing, anxiety develops and ruins the relationships.
Our knowledge is biased with so many facts including the media, academics, neighborhood, etc. etc. And on top of that when the flavor of self-driven intuitions also gets spiced up, things totally get upside down and we get more inclined towards negativities or exaggerations.
The dangerous side of negativism develops with the “spreading”. You maybe highly intellectual, but when driven by emotions, your mind has a bias towards negativities. Forgetting how close the person maybe to you, forgetting every good moments with them, at the time of an adverse occurring, you lose your emotional intelligence. You start talking against them, whether provoked or not. There maybe many people hearing you. And you forget that people hearing you also have an inherent bias to promote and spread negativeness.
We are so used to this bias that we are often ignorant of it. We think that we are just sharing some facts or telling the realities.
Negativities damage the relationships. You may get resolved with the person with whom you had the issue, but the spread negativities are already sold into world around (spread from one person to another and so). It will remain there unresolved forever waiting for an entry to come back to you. We are all human, so next time when another incident occurs with the same friend or your loved ones, the former negative bias in your environment gets added to the current event. You start experiencing the most exaggerated negativism. When the words go unchallenged for a longer period of time, gradually it appears to be “the truth” for some people. Things get worse further and further when the cycle repeats.
You start to lose your own energy. You spoil the image of your loved ones. And ultimately negative bias has an adverse add on effect.
Once negativities are spread, the cost of recovering it back to normal is too expensive. If you cannt control your emotions and want to talk to someone to release your hormones, ensure that the person at the other side
- Never gets biased and
- Never spread the negativities further.
We were so far discussing on preventing ourselves from spreading negativities to the world around. What about being exposed to negativities? Is that possible to shut the ears to negative talks always? For sure, we can’t prevent ourselves completely from being exposed to negativities. Just let us make not so badly affected or biased with that.
“Negativity spreads like wildfire”, we might have all heard this. In this beautiful story it is well narrated. Just taking it’s extract from Kamal’s blog.
” Once upon a time, an old man spread rumors that his neighbor was a thief. As a result, the young man was arrested and put behind bars for no fault of his own. After a long time, the poor man was proven innocent. After being released, he sued the old man for wrongly accusing him. In the court, the old man told the judge very casually as if nothing untoward had happened, ‘They were just random comments, they did not harm anyone.’
The judge, before passing sentence on the case, told the old man, ‘write all the bad things you said about him on a piece of paper. Cut it up into little pieces and on the way home, throw the pieces of paper out of your car window. Tomorrow, you come back to hear the sentence.’ The next day, the judge told the old man, ‘Before receiving the sentence, I want you to go out and gather up all the pieces of paper that you threw out of your car window yesterday.’
The old man said, ‘I cannot do that. The wind spread them all over the place and I will not know where to find them.’ Then the judge replied, ‘The same way, simple words and comments said in fun, may destroy the honor of a person to such an extent that a person will not be able to fix it. For the rest of his life he will be suffering for your actions. If you cannot speak well of someone, do not say anything at all. Do not slander him unnecessary. Let’s all be masters of our emotions, so that we will not be slaves of our words.’