Being connected and being in love are not the same. It is a sense of familiarity as we connect, like meeting our own self, like our own mind speaking, like that song which makes you close your eyes.
Still sometimes, even when the feelings are genuine and deep, we can’t express the care and love wholeheartedly when it is an opposite sex.
Likewise if you are a boy (or a girl), you would be a bit reluctant to praise a stranger girl (or a boy) even when she (or he) looks adorable in your eyes. Gender thoughts appear there too.
Why do the human brains think if its a girl or boy while expressing love?
Why do gender thoughts appear even while expressing the care and concern wholeheartedly towards opposite sex?
Why do gender biases discriminate feels of an open heart towards opposite sex even when the intentions are genuine?
Most of the time its’ because of the pre-conditionings happened in our brain which are mostly driven by the neighborhood or media or circumstances. Human brains have got so much pre-conceived notions or generalizations. And most of the times such thoughts of gender discrimination are way before injected into our minds. Hence such conditioning evokes certain unnecessary fears in mind.
Fears of getting misunderstood : Either romance or silly flirting
Love is a complicated feeling even while being simple and genuine.
Love has got many flavors. It is not always about romance. It is neither one thing nor just one emotion, but its that feeling when someone’s smile is yours, someone’s tears are yours.
But love is easily misunderstood as romance when the care and concern is between opposite genders. By the fear of getting misunderstood, I am not intending how you are being bothered by the presumptions of society, but your own bothering. You don’t want to lose the relationship. And you cannot make them understand too that “Being connected and being in love are not the same.”
Flirting is actually very very boring to the intellect. Some says it’s okay if done within a limits. But trust me, it is really an awkward feeling. Those who flirt are really making themselves undervalued as if they are more visual. So if you are a person keeping values and afraid of being misunderstood, chances are high to turn on an introvert mode while expressing your care and concern or even a simple appreciation towards the opposite sex especially when they are not so familiar to you too.
Fix it or exit
You have just two choices.
Either fix it or exit
If you wanna fix it, Talk, talk and talk in a healthy way. Come out of the shells of your conditioned mind. Break your fear and get rid of the pre-conceived notions. Or else you will have to carry that stream of affection inside of you the whole time.
And if you are truly observant, there would be instances awaiting your attention which can drive you to a conclusion on fixing it. And even after that if you are not becoming comfortable, just exit from the zone.
Trust your instincts, but even that trust should be an earned and not just a biased one.
Go with your unbiased instincts and make the world a little more beautiful with unbiased gender thoughts, expressing your love and care genuinely.
Let your heart reach your lips and bleed words
Don’t shelter your feelings in a cage.
After all what’s the point in suppressing all those emotions be it deep love or a simple smile.
“All of us are craving for sincere heart to heart connections, there who cares the gender”, let this be the thought driving us.