Experiencing thinking not just thoughts: Am I going insane..?

By | August 23, 2020

What am I feeling?

Happy or sad..?

I donno

Maybe happy as I’m yet to realize what makes me truly happy; truly happy in the sense without even a second thought in mind about whether I’m happy or not.

But now while smiling I’m sensing it as if ‘I’m experiencing what I’m experiencing’ which makes it weird actually. Likewise I can sense the teary brain, not just teary eyes while crying.

There is a mind within mind !!

Am I going insane..?

Half of my mind is going empty while the other half is still occupied with the ups and downs of emotions. The empty half of mind says, I’m totally sane as I’m having a grip over my own happy or sad mood. But it’s strange and making me go crazy as I’m,

Experiencing thinking not just thoughts !!

And yes, still I’m not lost as I can watch even my own craziness as an outsider.

That dew, that misty drop, juggling an insane heart & a sane brain, reminds me how one masters their thoughts even while being a slave to the emotions. Good & bad are just some insane stories we keep on pouring into the messy business of our own life.

So I don’t mind to say it aloud, I’m

sane or insane

Be different, be weird & Own both

I know, the thoughts are not any undisciplined mess to explore; what goes in mind is not out of mind (yet).

The empty thing doesn’t imply any void to be filled in from outside. I’ve to find this within myself.

Maybe I’ve to access the deepest part of my subatomic particles and farthest reaches of my brain cells to figure this out sane or insane thing.

Weird – “we cant observe consciousness, but can observe with consciousness”

In a way being wired to this weirdness is what makes me weird and sane at the same time!

Yes, This was all written for my terrible mind, but isn’t there a terrible-you in you too, finding the creative side of your brain..?

6 thoughts on “Experiencing thinking not just thoughts: Am I going insane..?

  1. Sha'Tara

    I’m going to spend some time on this post of yours. So much ‘resonates’ with how it is for me lately.

    Reply
    1. Akhila Post author

      Feeling good to read your words shatara, as if I knew it already.. as if I knew that you would catch it so easily .. as you always reflect me in some way or the other..lemme know more on your vibes

      Reply
    2. Sha'Tara

      Sane, insane, perhaps these concepts are no longer valid-if they ever were. Some of us have split body from mind and are mutating, opening up to new senses or reawakening ancient senses as we realize our world is changing and man’s static social systems are no longer sustainable. If upcoming conditions and global events will not allow us to keep a body and we are aware of this we must free ourselves to exist as nonphysical beings. We know that trick of course having used it between physical lives but now we need to live it even while still dragging a body around. The ‘insane’ are those who refuse to accept this and insist on carrying on as if traditional and static social institutions were determinants for reality and quality of life. Detachment plays a big role in accepting the coming changes.

      Reply
      1. Akhila Post author

        Mind beyond body..well, I’m not quite sure if I could fully digest what you were trying convey ..

        Reply
      2. Akhila Post author

        Astral projection is something which always I wanted to research…
        Actually as a matter of coincidence or not, here I’m reading your comment on splitting body from mind (I know you didn’t mean any OBE, but still…)

        Reply

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